Friday Evening Thoughts

    Another afternoon is gone, spent with my Nepalese friends. I felt like the foreigner today, as my friends shared little pieces of their culture with me - looking at photos of their homeland, watching a video clip of a Nepalese festival together, while Uncle explained in detail how the festival is carried out ... I understood maybe half of what he was saying, but the other half was spoken by his expressions. He was enjoying sharing his culture with me as much as I was enjoying learning!
    I love watching this family as they interact with each other. Typical of their people, all of the relatives share homes. Uncles, aunts, grandmothers and grandfathers, children and cousins all live together, often in the same home. My friends have two houses, and all of the family members go between both places constantly. Today I asked one of the children who one of the relatives was - cousin, brother, uncle?  She hesitated, then went to ask her mother!
    They're all so close, and love each other so much that the lines are blurred. They look out for each other, go out of the way for each other. They do the same for their friends. I love that. I learn so much from them.
   As I've spent time interacting with refugees such as this family, I'm finding more and more that the American stereotype of people from 3rd world countries is very, very, very wrong (can I even overemphasize that?). They are not dumb people; they do not need special-Ed classes so that they can function in the 'civilized' world. They do understand when you speak about them behind their back.
   Language is a huge barrier. You've probably had the experience of ordering at a ethnic restaurant, and being misunderstood. Maybe you felt frustrated, or though that the people you're dealing with just aren't educated.
    Nothing could be farther from the truth. Most of these people - whether they're refugees, immigrants, or  students - are working hard to learn English. But making a living is difficult. They were doctors, professors, surgeons in their home country; here, they are janitors. They make beds at the local hotel. They work in the Turkey Hill on the corner. And to make a living for their family, they work ... night and day. English class takes a back seat.
    So, when you interact with your foreign friends, know that they're people who are living and often thriving in a place that they do not understand; they are a people who are embracing a culture nothing like their own. They're lonely. Often they're confused, maybe ostracized because of ethnicity or religion. And they would love nothing more than to have a few friends who care ... friends that they can call when they can't figure out how to use their new stove (they cooked over a open fire in their home country). Friends who won't make them feel foolish for wondering how to ride the bus, or how to use American money.
    And I know that you'll find it to be a experience you'll never regret. You'll be blessed, and not just a little - good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over! As you have done to the least of these ...

   
   
    

Volunteering Day #1

Scanning the street, I located a parking spot and pulled next to the curb. Swallowing my fear, I double-checked the address I was given, and stepped onto the sidewalk. It smelled weird: a odd mix of curry and spices foreign to me. My arrival was obviously a object of curiosity, as numerous doors opened and several people stepped out to watch me walk by. I smiled, trying to look like I knew just what I was doing there - even though that was far from the truth!

I found the Nepali family's apartment without any trouble, and before I even knocked on the door, it flew open and a smiling, cheerful Nepali girl motioned for me to come in.  She shut the door behind me, and we proceed to greet one another - though she speaks very little English, and I speak absolutely no Nepali. Her sister, a older, much more traditional Nepali lady, stands and greets me in the traditional manner - hands together, slightly bowing,"namaste". She speaks no English, and is illiterate even in her own language.

So far, so good. I kept glancing at my cell phone, hoping that any minute now, my American contact (who knew this family) would arrive. She promised to be here! This is terrifying! These people speak no English, we cannot communicate, and worst yet, there is a continual stream of brothers and sisters and uncles and aunts, all coming to see the new English tutor - me. Terror fills my heart. Another round of greetings!

I finally gave up on the hope of having another American around, and just threw myself into the situation. "So ... do you like living in America?" My attempt at conversation was met with that all-too-familiar look. Okay, better try again.

Thankfully, after the initial feeling of fear of not being able to communicate, the three girls whom I was assigned to teach arrived home from school. The two youngest immediately climbed up on the couch next to me, and begin to whisper to each other, giggling.

The girls have obviously been very diligent at school. They can read fairly well. "e-l-e-p-h-a-n-t...says ephelant? Yes?" At my uncertain look, she scoots closer. "How you say?" She puts her dark hand on my arm, questioning. I notice for the first time the henna drawings on her hands and arms. Her trust and love for me, a perfect stranger, warms my heart. We sound out the word together, and she so painstakingly tries to imitate just how I pronounce it.

All too quickly, we're through all of their homework. These girls are incredible - they've adapted to their new culture so well, and so bravely! I find myself not wanting to leave. I love these girls; I love this family. I think ... well ... this cross-cultural thing isn't as scary as I thought!

Walking out their door and onto the sidewalk again, I suddenly feel like these people aren't just refugees anymore. They're friends.  And I can't wait to go back again!

Maybe you caught it already, but the above is my experience as a volunteer English/homework tutor. It's scary, and uncomfortable, and stretching - but the rewards are so worth the effort! And in case you wondered, I'm not working in a foreign country; the family I work with lives within 15 minutes of my home town.